[re-edit: they were both turtles.  geez you people...]

[EDIT: This post was updated to correct the mistaken identity of said tortoise. Neither turned out to be a turtle as posted earlier.]

Excitement doesn’t quite fulfill the experience that the Posse had today. While no one was injured or got pregnant during the ride, it was epic by all proportions.

To try and explain today in chronological order would just waste time. First lets talk about Terrence and Phillip. Terrence was the first turtle we ran into (pictures to come). There he lay on the trail, sunning himself thinking life was peaceful and quiet. Then then Posse arrived. We picked him up, passed him around, and oogled over his “cute” nose and claws. He was really quite social to be honest. He remained out of his shell to entertain us with his “airwalk” and periodic look of “what the fuck do you think you are doing with me? I am a turtle, leave me the fuck alone.” Later we ran into his boyfriend. A bit younger than Terrence, but I think they had a true connection in their relationship. Phillip, the shy one, also was sunning himself in the middle of the trail. A bit smaller and much less enteraining, Phillip was destined to greatness with his lyrical abilty and vocal range. A true artist, he kept to his shell but had so much to say. Lets hope he can get help to beat that herion habit he has.

In other news, I broke my chain, Blade had two flats, and A+ warned us of a boomerang, a snake and a giant rock. Did I mention that this ride was exciting?
Well loyal readers, you will have to see the photos. That is as soon as Blade puts his pictures on Flickr.

Till next post,
-fatleg

Mother Nature was kind to us today, very kind.  No rain and cool temps.  She owes us after yesterdays down pour and the soggy summer so far.  Actually Doug Hill and all the other local weather predictor people owe us for yesterday.  Their prediction of no rain was right on.  NOT!

So if you don’t know me I’m the newest member of the LP.  I’ve only got 6 rides under my crank-derailer-shock thingy.  I’m still learning the lingo.  …but I’m getting this riding thing down.  And I’m hooked!  So look out MTB world.  I’m on the trails now!

Schaeffer was crowded when we arrived at 1pm.  We road a few legs through the woods and ran into a few riders.   A few sections of the trails were really drenched forcing us off the bikes to walk.  We protect our trails!  After a while we rode the leg out in the field, where we ran into no one.  It was just LP and the corn caterpillars.  On the ride back to the parking lot we stopped and performed 1 minute of trail work.  Yay trail work!   We placed a smaller log in front of one that was blocking the trail to make it easier to ride over.  However we watched a rider attempt our new creation and got stuck going over.  So maybe we didn’t help after all.  Oh well.  I think all in all we rode 7.5 miles.  So much fun!

And there is no better ending to a fun ride at Schaeffer then stuffing your face with the food at the Dutch Market.  Let’s all say yummy together… YUMMY!  Pretzels were eaten.  Tummys were full.  And smiles were everywhere.  If only the Element had auto pilot so we all could have napped on the ride home.  We love that Dutch Market, yes we do.

Capt’n John on Tuesday, Wakefield on Thursday, Schaeffer today…  do we dare ride tomorrow?  Do we dare?  Yes we dare!!  We’re crazy like that!  See you on the trails!

A+

It was gorgeous. So the clouds were hoving and the wind was blowing. And the ticks were all over us. It was still gorgeous. We rode. On dirt… And if you live anywhere on or near the east coast you know that trail riding this season has been a bit of a challenge. Uh, Mutha Nature? Care to lay off the rain a bit??

Big news from todays ride. First and foremost: The Posse has been extended by an additional member. We are pleased to announce APositive as she is currently known. Thats her blood type and well, from the picture above you can tell why we know this. Welcome aboard A+! You now know all the secrets of this exclusive club. You can learn a bit about her on the Who are we page

The other big news? I farted and Tulip was blamed for it. Awesome, I know…

For a complete run down on the events of the day check out here and here for photographic evidence. Also, it looks like we are prepared from another ride tomorrow. I think it should be good.

Cheers!

-Fatty

Ok, let me gush for just one post. It doesn’t happen that often, and really doesn’t happen for these reasons. Yup, the title says it all. The Laurel Hill trails are fantastic. Really, really fantastic. Now before you grab your bike and rush off to Lorton VA, please take the time to read why I think this. It may not be for the reasons you would hope them to be.

The easiest way for me to start explaining is first get a couple of thoughts out and upfront. If I have  learned anything about our relationship (yes, you, the one reading this right now) is that you value honesty. So let me tell you some of the reasons that Laurel Hill is not great. This isn’t to be understood as “Reasons I hate Laurel Hill.”  This is simply items that will not be reasons for loving it. Is that fair? I thought so.

Facts about LH. (aka reasons that are not reasons I love Laurel Hill):

1. It is not technical. At all. Nada.

2. It does not make your lungs exploded from long, grueling climbs.

3. It does not make you piss yourself from terrifying descents.

Why I think Laurel Hill deserves best new trail in the DC area:

1. Did you know Lorton VA was site to a horrible, horrible prison ? It was!  This is where our nations capital would send it’s most harden, vile criminals to serve out their sentence for the terrible crimes they committed. And NOW????? It is a fast and flowing mountain bike playground.

2. Excellent use of the grounds. These trails have been planned in such a way to make great use of the space. And what a space it is! Mostly the trails sit in open fields with a few wooded sections.  Here, multiple loops connect so that you can mix and match your favorite parts for ideal distance. And it all sits on the grounds of a former maximum security prison.

3. It is fast, flowy and fun. You can haul-ass at speeds that make you pee yourself. Or, cruise along letting Mother Nature pass at your leisure. Your call. This is a great place for singlespeeds or fixies, rigid or hardtails, new rider or chain ring scarred veterans. And before anyone tries to tell me that it is “just too easy” you can shut your pie hole because you must be a  douche-nozzle that simply lives to deprive yourself of fun.  Comment dites-vous du FUN ?

4. It was a former Project Nike Missile site. And a prison. Did I mention a prison?

Thats all for gushing. Hope you find it as enjoyable as I did.

Cheers!

-fatty